Nine Days
by eclarefanxxx
Summary: In honor of a truly beautiful best friend; an angel taken much too soon.


On April 6, 2011, I lost my friend Jen. As the one year anniversary is approaching in a matter of months, I wanted to tell the story of what happened. Before reading, I would like you to know that Jen went into a coma from surgery complications on March 28, 2011, and she was in a coma for 9 days afterwards. She died on the 9th night of her coma. This is the complete memoir of my experience of staying by her side in the hospital. I hope you enjoy.

Nine Days

March 28, 2011.

"I can't believe you're getting surgery today! Aren't you scared? I've never been operated on before." Clare Edwards exclaimed into the phone to her best friend, Alli Bhandari. Alli and Clare had been through it all; tears, joy, sorrow, laughter, hugs, and so much more. The girls truly trusted one another, something Clare had never found easy to do. At just the age of eight years old, the girls had met and claimed they were "long-lost sisters". This was correct, in a sense, however, because Alli never had a friend like Clare. Clare trusted Alli with all her heart, mainly because Alli was as pure and trustworthy as a best friend could be.

Alli giggled. "Well, I _am_ a little _nervous_, but it'll be _fine_! It's just a minor operation, Clare! No need to worry," Little did Alli know, she would not be returning home from the dentist's office that day as planned.

Clare shook her head, wishing Alli did not have to have the operation. The operation initially ruined the girls' plans to have a sleepover that very night. "Don't you think getting your wisdom teeth removed will hurt?" she inquired, pacing her room and putting away the clean clothes her mother had folded for her.

"My mouth will be slightly swollen and sore, but I don't think it's supposed to last more than two or three days! Honestly, Clare, you don't need to worry about me. You can come over and eat lots ice cream with me when I'm home!" Alli laughed, leaning into the car seat a little farther as she was on her way to the oral surgeon's office. "Oh, Clare, I have to go. I'm almost at the office! Wish me luck!"

Clare smiled gently, plopping onto her bed. "Okay, Alli. Good luck! I'll see you soon, girly!" she grinned; ending the phone call after Alli had said her final farewell.

Two Hours Later…

"Yes, okay, okay, Mrs. Bhandari," Mrs. Edwards eagerly said into the phone as Clare was eating dinner. Clare turned around to see what the fuss was about. "Oh, my God. Is she okay? Cardiac arrest? What…Mrs. Bhandari, we'll meet you at the hospital. Yes, yes. Ah-we'll be there soon." Clare's mom quickly put the phone down and approached Clare, who was staring at her with horrified eyes open. Had something gone wrong with Alli's surgery? "Clare, honey, Alli's oxygen levels dropped during the surgery. She has gone into cardiac arrest, and they're taking her to the hospital now. We need to go, honey."

"Mom? What?" Clare shouted, jumping out of the chair and slipping her feet into some converse. "Mom! Let's go!" With that, Mrs. Edwards and Clare eagerly rushed to the car.

Clare silently prayed to God. _God, please don't take Alli away from me. Please. She's the nicest person ever, and I need her in my life! You've just got to help her, please, God. I'll never sin again if you just save Alli. Bring her…oxygen back, whatever you need to do! Please._ Clare bit her nails anxiously, waiting to see her best friend.

Clare's mom glanced back at her daughter during the agonizingly slow drive to the hospital. Knowing her daughter may have a chance of losing her best friend, she did not know what to even say. "Clare, it's alright. Just…say your prayers." Her mom suggested, pulling into the hospital's parking lot.

45 Minutes Later…

"Alli," Clare gasped as she walked into her friend's hospital room. There Alli was, connected to various wires and…breathing with the aid of a machine. Her heart rate monitor continued to beep, but she overheard the doctor explaining to Mrs. Bhandari, "I'm sorry. Her heart is beating just fine, but her brain activity is dangerously low to nothing. Oxygen supply was cut off to her brain during the operation. She _cannot_ breathe on her own. We'll do our best, but I don't think there's anything we can do, miss. I am so sorry." Mrs. Bhandari sobbed and clamped a hand over her mouth as Clare watched the scene unravel quickly.

With tear-filled eyes, Clare wandered over to Alli's side, pulling up a chair and tentatively grabbing her friend's limp hand. Alli's mother and father stood close to one another, eyeing Clare tearfully. Suddenly, it registered to Clare that Alli's parents did not believe their daughter would be able to pull through. Clare had to, though. She wasn't giving up on Alli, not even for a second. Hope works miracles, right? _Yes_, she decided as she lightly stroked Alli's hand, _she would not give up_.

"Honey, we don't know what's going to happen, but you can stay here for as long as you'd like." Mrs. Bhandari smiled through her tears at Clare, who was too shocked for her eyes to even produce them.

Clare nodded. "I won't leave her side."

The determination in Clare's voice was too much for Alli's mother, so she was escorted by Mr. Bhandari into the hallway, where she finally broke down and proceeded to cry in his embrace. Her husband just held her close; fearing for his only daughter's life.

Clare shook her head in disbelief at the pure horror that was gripping her throat. She swallowed harshly, tasting nothing, feeling nothing, seeing _nothing_.

Alli's body was still, very still. The machines beeped steadily around the room. It was clear to Clare that the doctors were exchanging extremely sad glances between one another; _they were just keeping a corpse alive. _"Doctor?" Clare murmured, her eyes never leaving Alli's stillness. She gripped Alli's hand tighter, wishing she'd open her eyes. Harshly, she pinched herself on the arm with her free hand, hoping she would wake up and it would all be a nightmare. However, all she got was a little pain and goosebumps running up and down her arm.

"Yes, dear?" The doctor answered, placing a hand on Clare's shivering shoulder. "Can I help you?"

Clare's teeth chattered slightly. "Is…is she going to be okay?"

The doctor frowned, wishing she could just tell the girl that Alli would wake up soon. In reality, she didn't know whether or not the young girl would wake up at all. "Honey, your friend went into cardiac arrest during the surgery. She's in a coma right now. Do you know what that means?"

"Yes." Was Clare's grave answer. _She couldn't believe this. It wasn't happening._ A coma. She'd seen it on TV lots of times, but she never thought she'd ever have to witness it in real life. On TV, people that went into a coma usually ended up dying, never waking up.

The doctor gave Clare a gentle hug and whispered, "I wouldn't give up hope just yet, sweetheart. Do you want me to go get your mom?"

Nodding her head, Clare watched the doctor slowly advance out of the room and retrieve her mother.

Hours Upon Hours Later…

Clare must have dozed off, because her body felt rather heavy when she was being shaken awake by her mother. "Honey, it's March 29th. Wake up, baby." Her eyes snapped open, Alli immediately returning to her mind. "Is…is Alli-" she trailed off when she saw Alli right in front of her. She looked no different.

Mrs. Edwards wiped a few tears away. "Love, Alli's…not doing well. I talked to the doctors, and they've told me that all they can do now is keep her comfortable. It's up to her parents when they want to take her off life support. I'm…so sorry, Clare." She kissed her daughter's cheek and whispered, "Do you want something to eat?"

"No." Clare responded, burying her face into Alli's arm and praying to God for the remainder of the day.

Ten Hours Later…

Her legs were stiff from sitting, but Clare hadn't moved even an inch from the second she had sat down. Her eyes never left Alli's peaceful being. "You're in Dreamland, aren't you?" Clare asked, smiling slightly when she recalled the place she and Alli had made up when they were younger. The girls conjured up Dreamland one night when Clare was having family issues. Dreamland was a land that you went to when you were asleep, and troubles and issues were unheard of there. Dreamland had everything you loved, from your favorite candies, to endless supplies of ice cream and activities that you loved. Only with Dreamland, the paradise didn't last, because you eventually woke up. "You may never leave Dreamland, will you, Alli? Alli, we…we still have lots of things that we need to do together. We need to study, laugh, and sing together like we always do. Remember our plan? You're supposed to come on vacation with me this summer. We're going to have so much fun!" Clare giggled hopefully, squeezing Alli's hand, but only feeling an uncharacteristic coldness to it.

Just then, Eli entered the room. "How's she doing?" he gestured to Alli, who's eyes were shut softly, her chest only rising and falling by the help of the ventilator. He understood why Clare did not give him an answer as he pulled up a chair beside her. "Clare, can I do anything for you? Do you need me to get you something to eat? What can I do? How can I help?" he asked eagerly, reaching for her hand and holding it with his own.

"I don't need anything but for Alli to wake up." She replied tersely, never averting her eyes from Alli's sleeping form. The machines never stopped beeping, and Clare's heart never stopped weeping. "Eli, how…how did this happen? She was _fine _just a day ago!"

Eli's eyes grew sad, his heart flattening with doubt. "I just don't know, Clare. _I just don't know." _Hours later, Eli finally stood up, alarming Clare slightly. "I'm sorry, Clare, but I've got to get home. We have school tomorrow, you know." He gently squeezed her shoulder and looked down at her questioningly.

"I'm not going." She stubbornly answered him, leaning her head onto her hands and continuing her prayers that had lasted over 24 hours now.

Eli sighed sadly, nodding in pity. "I can understand that. If you're out all week, I can understand that." He hugged her, a hug she could not return. Her arms were too stiff from not moving. He left.

Days Later… Who Knows How Many?

Alli Bhandari hadn't shown any improvement since day one in the hospital. Her brain activity was decreasing every day, so low that she could not open her eyes. Her heart was beating, _keeping a dead person alive._

"What day is it?" Clare asked her mother, who had taken the week off of work to support her daughter.

Mrs. Edwards kissed Clare's forehead lightly. "It's April 5th, Clare. Honey, where have you been all these days? The only times you've gotten out of this chair is to go to the bathroom and brush your teeth. Clare, there's nothing that can be done anymore. I'm sorry, but maybe we should leave Alli in peace."

"No. She can do this, mom." Clare responded, fixing her eyes on Alli's form, which seemed to just be fading away. A machine was all that was keeping her best friend alive. Emptiness, pain, tears, and sobs came onto her all at once. "Mom," Clare sobbed, hanging onto Alli's cold arm tightly and shoving her face into the crease of her elbow.

Mrs. Edwards sighed sadly, lightly running a hand down Clare's back. "No more tears, honey. No more tears," she stood up, surprising Clare.

"Where are you going?" she asked, wiping away her tears and seeking comfort that _just wasn't there. _

"I'm going to go home for a little while, Clare. I'll be back tomorrow morning, okay? Jenna's coming by again." Her mom smiled gently at Clare and slipped out the door.

Over the course of the week, Clare had seen many of her and Alli's friends. She was aware of their presence, but she did not speak to any of them. Jenna dropped by every so often to check up on things, tears running down her face when she never received a call stating that Alli was miraculously healthy and okay again. Eli dropped by for support, and so did many other students, some Clare didn't even know.

Alli Bhandari was a pretty popular girl, with the voice of an angel and the most charitable, loving heart anyone could imagine. Her arms were always ready to give out hugs. The girls celebrated many Christmases and birthdays together, never abandoning the other for as long as their lives depended on it.

Clare's stomach felt like it was swallowing itself. _She had not eaten in almost a week._ That's hard to imagine, right? Clare lived purely on ice cubes, water, and a fruit cup with a slice of bread that her mom had forced on her, _for almost an entire week._ She wasn't even hungry.

Doctors passed through here and there, casting sympathetic glances at Clare and distributing hospital food to her that she didn't touch. She didn't want food. She just wanted Alli to wake up.

Night eventually fell on the evening of April 5th, 2011. Clare could see it in the doctors' faces that they had serious doubts of Alli ever opening her eyes again. _If they were to take off the machine, Clare noticed, her __**best friend was going to die. **_

12:00 AM (Midnight) Of April 5th, Now Technically 6th, I Guess.

"Alli," Clare whispered her friend's name, hearing a response from Alli in her heart. "You're going to wake up, right?" she gestured to Alli's parents who were sleeping in chairs in the opposite corner of the room. The moon cast shadows in the room, outlining the hospital bed and the machines surrounding it. She kept her voice soft, low, and barely audible. _"Alli Bhandari, you are amazing. You are my best friend. You're the only one I can really trust. I don't want to go to school without you. Who else am I supposed to giggle about cute boys with? You know that boy, Liam? He really likes you. You're not supposed to know that, but I want to tell you now." Taking a deep breath, Clare ignored the pinching pain in her thinning stomach while she whispered, "You know all about my insecurities, Alli. You know all about them, yet you never tell anybody. That's because I can trust you. You know…that I want to lose weight all the time. You're always telling me I'm awesome the way I am, instantly giving me some confidence when I need it. You're just…there for me, Alli, and I'm there for you. So please…come back to me." _

No response. Just the beeping of endless heart monitors and hardly anything from the brain. Alli was…pretty much _gone. _

Clare shook hard, wishing somebody could comfort her. "It's time to come home from Dreamland."

Well…

The next day, Clare's mom returned to the hospital, begging her daughter to come home. "Sweetheart, this isn't good for you. You need to come home."

"No! I'm not leaving her! She's going to wake up, don't you see that?" Clare shouted, shrinking away from her mom's approaching touch.

"Listen, Clare, you are coming home with me right now. Mrs. Bhandari has agreed to call us if anything changes. I just want you to get a chance to get some good sleep and some food in your stomach, okay? Come on," she gently pulled her daughter up from the chair and led her out of the room.

Casting a pleading glance at her extremely still, sleeping friend, Clare gazed at her. _Alli_, Clare begged in her mind, _please wake ._

April 7th, 2011.

Feeling much better the following morning, Clare had been encouraged by her mom to try and go to school like the rest of Alli's friends. Clare did indeed feel better, since eating a proper meal in the first time in several days, feeling shower-fresh, and just hanging onto hope. It was all she had left in the world.

The phone rang.

"I bet she's awake!" Clare jumped up and down excitedly. Everything was going to be okay! Alli had returned from Dreamland and was ready to take on the world with Clare once again! Sitting down on the couch, Clare grinned ear to ear as her mom slowly picked up the phone.

Her mom slowly lowered herself onto the couch, her face…unreadable.

Clare's hands were cold. Maybe Alli was just waking up right now! Maybe this would be okay. She smiled to herself, knowing God hadn't let her down. She knew he wouldn't! Alli just needed a nice, long trip to Dreamland!

"Oh," Mrs. Edwards sucked in a large breath. "I'm sorry. No, I don't think it's a good idea to have her there either." There was a long pause while Clare's mom listened to Mrs. Bhandari. Clare heard loud sobs on the other end.

It was over.

Alli Bhandari had slipped away on the night of April 6th.

…and Clare hadn't been there to help. Clare had been forced to leave by her mother. If she had just stayed, maybe she could have done something.

_**"It's the bitter taste of losing everything that I've held so dear." **_

"Mom?" she whispered while her mom hung up the phone. She received a solemn nod and a light hug, before her mom told her to get ready for school.

The entire school day was…terrible.

_**"Though I've tried, I've fallen, I have sunk so low. I'm messed up, better I should know. So don't come around here, tell me I told you so."**_

Her stomach hurt. All day long, everything just hurt. Her body ached as she dragged herself from class to class, eyeing Alli's seat in every one of them. The chair was empty.

_**"Heaven bend to take my hand and lead me through the fire. Be the long-awaited answer to a long and painful fight." **_

Teachers and students were notified immediately, and Clare barely made it home before sobbing deeply in her pillow. She gripped the stuffed bunny her friend had given her for her eleventh birthday and threw it across the room, screaming and accidentally knocking her candle onto the floor. Glass shattered, just like Clare's heart.

To this very day, Clare has yet to believe that any of it really happened. To her, it was just a bad dream.

_Alli is everywhere, and…nowhere. _


End file.
